Unfortunately, bad, biased travel tips abound. I recently came across some advice about Africa (africanadoptions.org/donttravel.shtml) that exemplifies the worst of fear-mongering. The organization that published this seems to be an exemplary company that helps to arrange adoptions of African children, particularly from war-torn and poverty-ridden nations. So it’s a shame their advice is mostly ridiculous, discouraging, and stereotypical. We’re here to set them straight.
“Do not travel on dirt roads in a country that has ever had skirmishes or wars, regardless of how long ago.“
Guess I’ll put off that leaf-peeping drive through rural New England, home of those dastardly eighteenth-century revolutionaries. But this is for Africa, right, where there are oh-so-many paved alternatives. Right?
“Be alert for soldiers with AK-47s. If the AK is on their back you can relax. If the AK is in the soldier’s hands be alert. If the clip has been inserted quietly in the weapon, move away; always staying alert.”
And if the AK-47, with quietly inserted clip, is sighted on your American skull, start professing your love of hockey, eh.
“Try not to sit in an aisle seat on a plane. Terrorists are known to give more trouble to passengers in aisle seats because they can easily reach them.”
Right, more trouble to those jerks stretching their legs, versus the other ones they just plan to blow up. The University of Paranoia did an exhaustive study on cramped terrorist passengers.
And possibly my favorite:
“At ALL airports mentally count your luggage and count again and count again. Count your bags while you are gathering everything together at the airport. Count them when someone is helping you. Count them, as they are loaded in a taxi. Count them when someone is helping to unload the taxi and count your bags again when they are carried to your room.”
This is known as the foolproof “Rain Man Technique,” and it works even better if you bob and sway slightly. (Don’t try this near soldiers with quietly clip-loaded AK-47s.)
Who needs more than one bag anyway?
Jeff
